Netflix, Dating Apps and Billionaires.
Anyone seen the new show Tinder Swindler on Netflix?
For those who have not seen it, it’s about a series of women who were swindled by a guy who flaunted a billionaire lifestyle and seemed to have the goods to back it up. Private jets, lavish vacations, a bodyguard and a billionaire dad. He not only proved it on Instagram but lavished this lifestyle on several women he met online. He was a swipers dream come true.
But prince charming apparently had a lot of enemies chasing him so he asked his “girlfriends” if he could borrow their credit cards so his adversaries could not track him down while he used his own. Of course, he would pay them back with interest. The women obliged. In fact, one of his targets took out 10 different loans to the tune of $250K to help him out.
Spoiler alert: He was bluffing. He was using the money from one to pay for the other. He had multiple identities and these women were all out a lot of cash.
People should not lie, cheat or steal. They also should not ignore non – verbal cues, red flags, or behavior that makes you say hmmmm? But It’s easy to ignore the obvious especially when we are enjoying the ride.
It reminds me of a guy I went out with who sported a limited-edition watch, fabulous shoes and the ability to spend more on dinner than most people pay in rent each month. He lived in a very expensive NYC apt building. The tell was he had no furniture.
People show you want they want. It is easier than ever with social media.
The good news is you can create the table image or perception that you want. The other news is so can everyone else. Who has not been fooled by the loudest talker in the room who tries to create the appearance of being the smartest person at the table or the ultra-aggressive boss or client who tries to knock you down to make you doubt your worth?
Here are 3 things to consider about perception and first impressions:
- Read the table and the cues. If someone’s actions don’t align with what they present on the outside reevaluate. First impressions are a fact of life but keep an open mind and look at the total picture. We often are hesitant to change our opinion about someone especially if we like their personality but often, we have to reassess based on their actions.
- If it’s too good to be true, it probably is. If someone is constantly saying they are the best or they are being loud and exuding an exponential amount of bravado, there is a good chance that it’s too good to be true. While confidence is a very important attribute, this pompous type often wants to create an image of being intimidating and skilled, when in reality, they are compensating for other short comings. Beware of those who appear to have it all together or promise too much too soon.
- For better or worse people’s perceptions are created based on what they see on the outside.Whether it’s the awards you’ve won, the number of social media followers you have, the confidence you project, how you dress ,your body language, the tone and speed of your voice. Make sure that you are putting out the table image that you want because that’s what gets you in the door. Then take that opportunity to back it up with the right actions.And remember swipers beware…..
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